The Peerless Power of Comics!

After the battle where Thor finally ended the threat of the Air-Walker, young Kevin Matheson wasn't feeling too inclined to send any Christmas spirit in the God of Thunder's direction:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Nor does it seem the newly arrived Firelord is bringing any tidings of great joy:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Good grief! Why is Thor being dumped on this time of year??

Like Kevin, Firelord seems to be operating under the misconception that Thor has slain an innocent being. But the similarities end there, since Firelord has the power to incinerate Thor for his alleged crime:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

...or does he?

Yeah, about that--let's settle the matter once and for all that FIRE PRESENTS NO DANGER TO THOR. Doesn't that seem ridiculous? I can't believe no one has ever said it out loud like that. But look at all the times he's brushed off Firelord's attacks. Look at how many times he's battled Surtur and survived. The guy can even leap into an open-pit furnace--a furnace, mind you--and carry on a conversation with himself as if he's running down his things-to-do list for the day:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As for Firelord, he's even attacking Thor with cosmic-powered flame, "birthed in the raging heart of a million suns." Phooey. Apparently he could drop one of those suns on Thor and not even be able to give him a tan:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Jeez, look at this guy. Not even his clothing caught fire? Or his hair? Really? Hold a strand of hair over the flame of a match and see what happens. I guess even Firelord has a thing or two to learn from we humans.

But Firelord isn't through with Thor yet, not by a longshot. And their fight takes them into the water:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As well as the beach:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Before Thor has finally had enough and unloads on this hothead:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

With things between Thor and Firelord at such a fever pitch, you'd think the last thing Thor would think of would be surrendering to him in order to end the fight--particularly with Firelord so focused on revenge. Of course, he's probably thinking, "What can it hurt to try? After all, it's not like this guy's stupid fire can harm me." But the tactic works, particularly when Thor knows there's the extenuating circumstance of Firelord's grief over Gabriel still hanging in the air:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And so Firelord recounts for Thor his history with Gabriel--as fellow Xandarians, who had an unfortunate encounter with the ship of none other than Galactus:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But Gabriel's successful and now willing association with Galactus was fated to come to an end, as well as a new beginning:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

The "new" Gabriel, unfortunately, was no substitute for the more engaged herald Galactus had come to know--and so Galactus set out to reclaim the Silver Surfer, still imprisoned on Earth, and again conscript him as his herald; but thanks in part to the mechanical Gabriel's arrogance, the encounter instead led to Galactus being driven from Earth empty-handed. Eventually, Pyreus--Gabriel's comrade on his old ship--locates Galactus and demands the return of his friend, though the meeting would take a different direction:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Now that Thor has all the facts, he's able to help to finally provide Firelord with the closure he's been seeking regarding his friend. And Firelord's departure from Earth has Thor reflecting favorably on the episode:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As for Firelord--with his memories now restored to him of the robot Gabriel's origin, I would have thought he would have sought out Galactus in order to locate his friend's body and mourn his loss, rather than funnel so much of his grief into a robot that held little if any of his comrade's disposition and only mirrored him physically. Indeed, it would have stood to reason that Firelord would already have come to terms with Gabriel's death, once Galactus kept his word to Pyreus and subsequently revealed Gabriel's fate to him after transforming him into Firelord. But it's a touching epilogue to the story, if a little after-the-fact.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

By the way, on a more unpleasant note, the thought occurs that when Thor's time ever comes, he'll have to have burial rites as well, since cremation isn't likely to have any effect on him.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

("Siegfried" doesn't count.)

Generation X had something of a subdued Christmas Eve in its twenty-fourth issue--where, instead of high-spirited snowball fights or grand gatherings of X-folk, the female members of the team take refuge in Monaco from the anti-mutant hysteria in the states and get to know each other a little better. Though, compared to her younger charges, Emma Frost opens the story with a far more profound interpretation of the holidays:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Together with Monet St. Croix, Paige Guthrie, and Jubilee, you'd almost expect Emma's opening thoughts to dictate a night of Christmas remembrances amongst the four. But we soon see that Jubilee's frankness derails that train of thought:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Instead, the theme of the issue takes a different tack, with Jubilee nudging everyone in the direction of bonding, if informally:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And so we go in another direction from Christmas altogether, pursuing what seems the perfect ice-breaker for "tell[ing] each other anything...even things we never told another person": in this case, how each of them experienced the first manifestation of their power.

For Jubilee, the time came when she and her BFF were a couple of skater mall rats using that particular locale as their own personal skater park, paying little heed to shoppers and recklessly evading security. Only one day, Jubilee took a wrong turn and boxed herself in, with the cops catching up to her and closing in:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Monet, on the other hand--probably to no one's surprise, as much of an enigma as she's been to her classmates--manufactures a story putting her discovery of her powers in the best possible light, with the only thing missing being a ticker tape parade in her honor. Unknown to the other three in the room, however, Monet receives a visit and reprimand from Marius, her brother who's imprisoned in another dimension:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Monet's history is convoluted, to say the least, and would take awhile to play out in Generation X. But the story is content to maintain the status quo where she's concerned, with only a wry comment from Jubilee once Marius's secret presence has been banished:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Next up at bat is Paige, whose power as Husk I've never found either appealing or much of an asset to an X-team. Paige's story of her beginnings is short and sweet--her brother, Sam (as Cannonball) has already discovered his power and travelled to enroll at Xavier's school, and Paige is eager to see what abilities she'll have. And on her thirteenth birthday, her prayers are answered:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Not really feeling the thrill with you here, Paige. By the way, have fun cleaning up your discarded skin from now on.

Finally, we come to Emma, whose beginnings are not unexpectedly darker than those of the others. And while frank with her story, she's nevertheless selective in the details she chooses to include:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

It was often a struggle for me to read Generation X, finally stopping well short of completing its run and pulling the plug on it around issue #35. But this issue was a bit of order tucked within its chaotic direction and characters--nothing really too deep or compelling, but a nice read to pass the time. In fact, why not just let the ladies close it out here, since they seem to reflect that general feeling.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

We've come to the end of our special Christmas-themed posts, and I can think of no better way of concluding this series than to celebrate Christmas Eve with the birth of a very special son.

Though this probably isn't the son who first comes to mind.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Shortly after Dracula's battle with Dr. Strange, the lord of vampires took control of a satanic church cult in order to expand his sphere of influence in the states:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

When he revealed himself to the satanists who would be his new followers, they were involved in a ritual which would offer up one of their own, a woman named Domini, as Satan's bride. Yet, due to Dracula's timely arrival during the ceremony, as well as his display of his own powers, the gathering mistakingly believed Dracula to be their "Dark Lord," Satan. And he decided to alter his plans accordingly, including taking Domini as his own:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Unexpectedly, Dracula's bond with Domini grew to the point where he came to care for her a great deal. And while the cult's high priest, Anton Lupeski, knew that Dracula was indeed not Satan, he realized that he could still make use of the vampire's relationship with Domini to enhance his own power base. And so another ritual was invoked--one that would implant a child within Domini, to be born on December 25:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And so we skip ahead nine months, to the eve before that very date. But forces are at work which might make this night anything but peaceful for the expectant father.

At first glance, the night before his child's birth seems one of contentment for Dracula, compared to having spent the prior months in various battles with Quincy Harker and his associates as well as the Silver Surfer:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

It's curious to see Dracula preoccupied with thoughts of an heir, considering that he's immortal and will never need to cede his name or power to anyone. In fact, at a later christening ceremony (Satanic style) for the child, where Lupeski seeks to fire up the cultists with the notion that the child shall be their leader, Dracula is livid at Lupeski's obvious power play and angrily reminds everyone in no uncertain terms that it's Dracula who will be the center of power.

But, putting that aside for the moment, what of that cryptic wording about the night turning out differently than Dracula expects? We saw very similar wording the night the child was conceived, didn't we?

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And we find one more piece of this puzzle, in the form of a strange but earnest request from Domini:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But the arrangements for Domini's delivery are unfortunately not the only preparations being made this night. Word has reached Harker's group of the imminent event, and their mission to end Dracula's existence remains as strong as ever:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Also, Lupeski is eager to eliminate Dracula so that his own plans for Domini and the child can proceed. And when Rachel Van Helsing decides to move on the church on her own, he sees an opportunity to accomplish just that, and offers her assistance that will help to meet his own ends:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

It's not every father-to-be whose enemies converge on him when his wife is due to give birth--but it seems that all of our players are now in place for a very violent confrontation. At 10 p.m., after Rachel makes a call to her friends to let them know where Dracula is located, her hatred is such that she decides to attack Dracula without waiting for backup:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But when Dracula hears Domini cry out for him, he strategically retreats, surprising Rachel around a bend and brutally rendering her unconscious. And when he returns to tend to Domini, we discover another indication that this night is playing out in a way much differently than Dracula realizes:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

It's just after 11:30 p.m. when Frank Drake and his group find Rachel, and they race in just as Domini is in mid-labor:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Once Dracula disposes of Blade and Rachel as well as Harker's loyal dog (at least for the moment), it's time for an almost laughable confrontation, as Frank is somehow under the impression that he's Dracula's most fearsome foe in a battle of equals:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Really, Frank needs to be thrown through a few more walls. And hopefully a few more after that. Maybe then the message will sink in that, in the company of Blade and Rachel and even Quincy, he's probably the LEAST threatening to Dracula and always has been. What was he thinking?

Anyway, when Rachel and the others regroup, it's midnight on the nose. And you know what that means:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Not that Dracula doesn't make a compelling argument for his attackers to depart--but it's surprising to see Rachel and the others indeed back off, given their earlier fierce determination to deal with Dracula. Still, when a cute little tyke like Dracula's newborn is in the line of fire, even Rachel must yield to her humanity. But, despite the peace that Dracula has found this Christmas, his carefully laid plans for both his son and his church may slip through his grasp.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Can YOU

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Name This Marvel Villain??

Tyrannus goes back quite a ways. He almost seemed to be created as a throw-away villain, with not much thought given to either his origin or his potential. He made his initial appearance in the first Incredible Hulk series, which was cancelled after just six issues--what does that tell you? Yet over time, when a ruthless villain was called for without needing to go into much detail of why he was reaching for power, Tyrannus was available.

This should probably tell you all you need to know about the character:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Basically, Merlin--who I had no idea was wandering around the Roman Empire--had some sort of altercation with Tyrannus, and banished him to "Subterranea" (Marvel's name for, well, the depths of the Earth). Tyrannus comes across a race of dwellers there who have an aptitude for science, and becomes their ruler; he then foils Merlin's plan for his fate (which I guess came down to burying him alive, so to speak) by finding the Fountain of Youth and using it to keep himself young, while he builds his weapons cache and plans an assault on the surface world.

Finally ready in the 20th century, he uses Betty Ross--the daughter of Gen. "Thunderbolt" Ross--as insurance against atomic reprisal. Which brings him into conflict with the Hulk, who ends up toppling some pillars and trapping Tyrannus underground. Like I said, not much thought to this story; and practically anyone could have been plugged into Tyrannus's role.

Tyrannus is one of the most two-dimensional characters I can think of--so I don't suppose you'll find him sitting at villain summits with the likes of the Red Skull or Dr. Doom. He's had a few turf wars with the Mole Man, naturally; and he makes lots of power plays, like he did as a part of They. (Probably to be expected by a guy named "Tyrannus.") But when the story comes to its end, that usually goes for Tyrannus, as well, either by a cave-in or an explosion or a fatal miscalculation on his part. Aside from the few hooks his character has--his centurion costume, or his need to keep drinking the waters that restore his youth--there really isn't much reason for him to be more than the villain du jour in a book, nor much of a reason to dig him up from the center of the Earth. Perhaps Merlin got what he wanted, after all.

In the third issue of The Thing, published in late 1983, you may remember writer John Byrne coming up with this interesting twist to the Inhumans' dimension-traveling dog, Lockjaw, where he becomes an Inhuman in more than just name only:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Lockjaw, it seemed, had undergone the same traditional exposure to the Terrigen mists, the substance which select Inhumans are exposed to in order to gain the enhanced appearance and abilities indicative of the Inhuman race. Lockjaw, according to Byrne, was now revealed to be not a mere dog (er, with a grip of iron and dimension-spanning abilities), but another member of this hidden race that had been exposed to the Terrigen mists.

But in a 1991 X-Factor story, writer Peter David dismantled Byrne's refit of Lockjaw with--what else?--a humorous take on the revelation, thanks to Quicksilver:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Except that there are details to the incident in question that don't mesh with David's interpretation.

In the original situation, Pietro plans to expose his daughter to the Terrigen mists because he considers her being wholly human a serious drawback. At the request of Luna's mother, Crystal, the Thing has come to prevent Pietro from going through with his plan. Pietro, however, is adamant; but he's either unaware of or choosing to ignore the fact that exposure to the mists produces haphazard results, and that there's no way to know how the subject will be affected. A fact that finally hits home with him when Lockjaw steps forward:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Ben, as well, is stunned by the news--which, at the time of the story's publication, explains much about the Inhumans not only to him but also to us. But he uses the opportunity to hammer in the message for Pietro that he might want to count his blessings with Luna as she is, instead of unilaterally deciding otherwise:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

So it really doesn't make sense that Karnak and Gorgon (to whom it probably would never occur to play a practical joke on anyone, assuming they even knew what one was in the first place) would have so little regard for Crystal as to choose such a tense and obviously delicate situation to duck out of sight, break out their little transmitter and have some fun with the Thing. And I highly doubt that they'd have the presence of mind to take advantage of the same setup and think to use Lockjaw to defuse the situation with Pietro at the same time. That would be an incredible roll of the dice at the worst possible time.

Fortunately, in Byrne's version, we can assume that Gorgon and Karnak have the good sense to 86 their little prank until this crisis had passed; and I rather enjoyed Byrne's new take on Lockjaw, even thinking to make it clear that it would be a rare day when Lockjaw's voice would be used to any degree. But a moot point, since David effectively returned Lockjaw to being a dog through and through--and in another story, we'll see how well Lockjaw works as a concept when he's merely (Inhu)man's best friend.

Gosh--ordinarily, this would make a great "Avengers charging into battle" scene, wouldn't it?

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But actually, it's more like four against one, as the Avengers are out to get one of their own:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Remember the good old days when Avengers attacked each other for no good reason at all? Goliath, as Hawkeye, having worked with Quicksilver as members of the first group of replacement Avengers, is certainly familiar enough with Pietro's posturing and arrogance, to say nothing of possessing his own generous supply of cockiness, so you'd think he'd give Pietro the benefit of the doubt here--maybe even say, oh, I don't know, "What's up, Quickie?" Instead, his first instinct is to attack a former Avenger who's just arrived on the scene--one who, Goliath knows bloody well, has issued no threat whatsoever.

But what's done is done. While we're at it, let's bring in another unlikely source of aggression against Pietro: Captain America, who, instead of putting the brakes on Goliath's attack, figures the best way to stop the unnecessary fighting is to escalate the unnecessary fighting:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Serves him right. It's too bad the Panther's voice of reason is muffled by that mask he wears. Maybe he should go back to wearing the half-mask he wore when he first joined the team.

But, back to the skirmish--we can't have Quicksilver triumphant against the Avengers, can we? After all, the two words "Quicksilver" and "triumphant" are almost never used in a sentence together. He's been clobbered by Spider-Man; heck, he's been clobbered by just about anyone he goes up against. Super-speed is one lousy power for someone in the Marvel universe, where it only works well when the story needs it to work well. For instance, you probably didn't know that a super-speedster would have no defense against mere swiftness:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

So I doubt we'll see the Avengers actually lose this scuffle with Pietro. In fact, with Pietro's track record (heh heh, "track" record), I wouldn't be surprised if he defeated himself:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Sigh.

Jeez, Pietro. Do we need to get an old super-speedster to show you how to take out the Vision?

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Still, for a few fleeting panels, Quicksilver was doing pretty well against his fellow Avengers. So let's see how he does against another super-team, hmm?

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Okay, who's putting money down on Pietro? Come on, be a sport!

His first time out against the FF, Quicksilver, like his situation with the Avengers, was on a desperate mission to solicit help, this time in a matter involving the Inhumans. But, somewhere in the Marvel manual, asking for help first involves hostilities breaking out:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Yes, you've probably guessed that Reed is going to spoil the party here. And watch how easily he can use his powers to nab Quicksilver:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But in this second meeting with the Fantastic Four, Pietro's mind has become, shall we say, unhinged, and he's clearly in attack mode:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And, believe it or not, he gives the FF a "run" for their money (ha ha, more speedster humor!). In the issue of Quicksilver's prior encounter with the Avengers, the cover boldly asks, "How do you catch the world's fastest man?" If it's usually accomplished in just 2 or 3 panels, then you're probably doing it wrong. In this encounter, Quicksilver's power is displayed much more realistically--hit-and-run attacks that clock the FF before they can react. The only flaw in Pietro's attack is that, after each strike, he gives the FF time to recover, and adapt--something he presumably wouldn't make the mistake of doing, were he in his right mind.

Still, the FF are having a hard enough time dealing with his attacks, as he mows them down one by one:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Pietro must be on calcium supplements, because there was a time when those bones of his weren't so sturdy at dealing with collisions with hard objects:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Meanwhile, Reed and Sue, perhaps the two people on this team most able to deal with Quicksilver, seem to have left their strategy and experience in their other uniforms. Reed, for instance, focuses on thinning himself out this time, rather than expanding, and thereby becoming more vulnerable:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

While Sue forgets that she can project her force field in a perimeter barrier, precluding the need to predict Pietro's direction:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

However, since the issue's purpose is to nudge the Thing into assuming leadership of the FF when Reed and Sue take a leave of absence, it falls to him to think his way out of this fight and assume the initiative in dealing with Quicksilver. Which means that, even when a foe is racing toward you at about 150 m.p.h., you still have plenty of time to dig into the street and form a ramp:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And that's how you catch the world's fastest man. One of the many, many ways.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

One of the most delightful Marvel tales you'll read comes from the the 2005-2006 series, The Thing, which finds Ben Grimm dealing with his status as a billionaire. In issue #4, writer Dan Slott covers a lot of bases but finally narrows down the story's focus to two fronts: Ben getting some unexpected words of wisdom about materialism from his nephew, as well as a touching look at his bond with Lockjaw, the Inhumans' giant teleporting dog.

Yet, aside from Slott's obvious wish to dote on the title character, "Paws & Fast-Forward" turns out to be an excellent Fantastic Four story, with generous time given to Reed, Sue, their children, and Johnny, and giving us a look at the close-knit family they've become. Most of the story is of course seen from the perspective of the Thing, while dealing in the rest of the FF, the Inhumans, and its obligatory villain as needed. I'd say the story is roughly 3 parts characterization and 1 part battle, which is a balance I found I could easily live with. At the end of it, I was pleasantly amazed that all of it could fit so neatly into one issue, and still manage to be so satisfying and entertaining.

It's Lockjaw that actually starts our story, when an exercise involving Karnak results in a piece of lunar shrapnel being embedded in the dog's skin:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Lockjaw seeks out members of the royal family, one by one, for assistance in dislodging the piece of marble, but surprisingly gets no sympathy, with no one realizing he's been wounded and the assumption being made that he's just stirring up trouble. It's really the only part of the story I didn't care for, as Lockjaw has often been a more than valuable part of their group and is basically treated like dirt by everyone:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

I must say, though, that being rebuffed by the Watcher had its element of humor:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And so, with a glance at the Earth, Lockjaw heads to the Fantastic Four for help--but, unfortunately, he finds everyone on the team so involved with their own concerns that they don't even notice him. Tell me this team doesn't need glasses, not to notice Lockjaw, for Pete's sake. On the other hand, in a way it's a tip of the hat to how much the Fantastic Four have experienced in their career and the sights they've simply grown used to. But at least there's one member of the team with a good heart, and who's "roamed" enough with Lockjaw to always offer him some attention:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

"And they called it--puppy love." -- Donny Osmond

Naturally, Lockjaw wants to hang out with his friend for awhile--and when Reed requests Ben's help with babysitting off-site, it makes for an interesting day for the whole group:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

I wouldn't worry about Franklin's mood, if I were you. He's a somewhat unknowing part of a plan of Reed's to give Ben some perspective on his new-found wealth. But before that plays out, Ben takes the kids to the track and gets a "shocking" surprise:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

I think it's clear by now that, for all intents and purposes, Lockjaw is Ben's dog, whatever the Inhumans might think. And as far as seeing to his young charges' safety, let's just say Lockjaw has a big advantage over the normal family pet:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

No, I don't know how the Inhumans made it to Kree space so quickly either, without their teleporting dog. As for Lockjaw, he's heading right back to Earth to help his orange buddy:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Yep. Ben's dog, without a doubt.

And what happens next comes as no surprise whatsoever:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Talk about finding your pet a good home.

In the meantime, Ben has pulled Franklin aside and discovers the lesson he's learned from his father about how having money to buy whatever you want isn't the blessing you first think it's going to be--and the lesson sinks in for Ben, as well, just as Reed knew it would. And so the end of the story finds both Franklin and Ben having a deeper appreciation of family, now complete with their family dog:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

A manhole cover. I'd hate to see what Ben's going to use as a stick.

Remember the Masked Matador? Wh... you don't?? Why, he was one of Daredevil's most powerful foes!

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But Daredevil himself probably holds the same opinion of the Matador as you and I:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

The Matador got his start around the same time as Daredevil, and had a rather high opinion of himself as an adversary, though he mainly spent his time conducting thefts and burglaries. But since word was just beginning to get out about Daredevil and public opinion was starting to shape his reputation, it became important to DD to score a win against the Matador, who pretty much made a laughing stock of him in their first encounter:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Things didn't improve for Daredevil when they next met, as the Matador unknowingly took advantage of Daredevil's Achilles heel--fighting him in a roomful of panicking, angry partygoers, which overwhelmed his radar sense:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

So finally, DD had the good sense to choose the site of their next meeting--and he's also done his research and discovered the Matador's identity and background. And things take a turn for the worse for our bullfighter:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

No, your eyes aren't playing tricks on you--the Matador, a skilled bullfighter whose job requires that he constantly get out of the way of a charging bull, doesn't have the presence of mind to simply side-step Daredevil's leap and let the guy ram head-first into that chimney. Caramba.

When the Matador later becomes a charter member of Electro's Emissaries of Evil, he's unfortunately still at a disadvantage relying on that cape of his, which doesn't hamper a blind man in the slightest:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

I think at last report, the Matador was hoisting a few cold ones at the Bar With No Name, a watering hole frequented by super-villains. Let's hope that's as close as he gets to getting back into circulation.

When "The Sensational NEW"Captain Marvel ended its five-issue run in late 1970 with issue #21, you can't say they didn't send him out with a bang:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Issue #17, which began the adventures of Mar-vell in his new costume, continued the title's publication schedule without missing a beat, which made it seem to the buyer that Captain Marvel was simply continuing the original series while taking the character in a new direction. But it would only take three more issues before it became apparent that the book was on life support. Its fourth issue, #20, was delayed for a whopping six months, with its cover doing its best to make lemonade out of a lemon:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Another two months would pass before the fifth and, as it turned out, final issue went on sale. Though to hear Marvel tell it, these five issues of Captain Marvel were never meant to be more than a limited run:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Oh, I'm guessing your readers had already rendered their verdict, gentlemen.

Yet, putting aside the spin, I must say that the creative team of writer Roy Thomas, artists Gil Kane and Dan Adkins spared no effort to close this series with a decent issue, featuring a fine matchup between Mar-vell and the Hulk and showcasing each of them nicely. I don't know what kind of an audience its story found at this point, but in hindsight you have to wonder what was fundamentally missing in this character that such talents as Thomas, Kane, and Adkins couldn't pull him out of his nose dive and make the book a top seller. If the character of Captain Marvel was ever going to find his legs, it should have been here, and with these people holding the creative reins.

The story actually begins in the prior issue, where Rick Jones has sought out Bruce Banner at his hidden lab in the desert, in the hope that his old friend can free him of his dual existence with Mar-vell:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Naturally, the closing pages of that issue use a raging Hulk on the verge of attacking Rick to prod readers into picking up the next issue. Which probably gives you an idea of what's wrong with this title: can't Mar-vell close his own issue? Isn't he enough of a draw to sell the next issue of his own mag?

In fact, the Hulk is handled so well in the follow-up scene, you're almost wondering who's supposed to be carrying this story:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

With the situation defused, the Hulk changes back, and Banner gets to work on finding access to the Negative Zone. Here, as in a later Avengers story, Thomas finds a reason not to seek assistance directly from Reed Richards, who can basically say "sure, no problem, glad to help" and have Mar-vell out of the Negative Zone before you can say "Annihilus," so we have to swallow that Banner can throw together something from scratch to access the Zone. At least the story provides a further complication, when a colleague that Banner wishes to consult with at a nearby university ("Desert State University"--what else?) is being besieged by student protests, which puts additional strain on an already strained Bruce Banner:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

The Hulk, in his rage, lashes out and destroys all the lab equipment that Banner had finished up to that point, dooming the project. And when Rick changes to Mar-vell, who attempts to calm the Hulk--well, Mar-vell isn't going to rack up any sales that way, is he?

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

It doesn't take us long to find out that Mar-vell is outmatched here, though clearly it comes as a surprise to him. But half the fun is getting there, especially when the driver is Gil Kane:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

With Mar-vell dispatched, the situation becomes desperate when the Hulk's focus turns to the students at Desert U., a group of people he misinterprets as a threat. And Mar-vell realizes he's the only one who can act to save them:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

(A nice touch by letterer Artie Simek, who turns Mar-vell's departure from the lab into a race against time with a simple sound effect.)

The Hulk of course reaches his targets first, with Thomas again demonstrating his flair for writing the character vis-à-vis the Hulk's constant tug of war with Bruce Banner. Fortunately, Mar-vell arrives on the scene when it becomes apparent that Banner has lost this round with his alter-ego:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

The next panels almost have a "better late than never" feel to them, with Mar-vell practically uttering his worth as a combatant to himself (and to the reader?) before tearing into the Hulk no-holds-barred. Unfortunately, it's a rush we're not allowed to savor for long, as we're reminded again that the hero of this book has limitations that feel like they chafe more at us than at him:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

So it's left to Rick Jones--Rick Jones--to end an issue of Captain Marvel. If you're wondering who the hero is supposed to be in this book, have a look who ends up facing down the Hulk, and winning:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

In the end, we have a really cool battle issue, but we're left a little frustrated by a title character no one seems to know what to do with. And thanks to this story, it looks like we don't even get three hours of Mar-vell anymore; instead, the hero we're supposed to be reading about is benched, just when things were getting good. Funny thing is, if Rick is getting a good deal of panel time and development, and Mar-vell hasn't been succeeding as a character, why not just give Rick the new Mar-vell costume and the nega-bands? It's the life the character always wanted, isn't it?

It would be another two years before Mar-vell would get another crack at it, with three deplorable issues hitting the racks (have a look, but you were warned!) before Jim Starlin would begin his memorable run on the title--though Marvel would tread more carefully this go-around with a bi-monthly schedule. It finally looked like they had found a way to bring to life the hero who wouldn't die--that is, not quite yet.

For those of you who have ever tuned in episodes of the mid-'70s series Kolchak: The Night Stalker, it was just a year after the show ended when writer Marv Wolfman cooked up a clever story which paid homage to the dogged Carl Kolchak, using his own intrepid reporter:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As sometimes was the case with the television series, this story in Tomb of Dracula also finds our reporter, Paul Butterworth, frantically hammering out on his typewriter the grim details of the story he's been pursuing, with the murderer presumably on the way over to end his life.

But let's turn back the clock a little, where we find Butterworth on the beat for his newspaper, the Boston Bugle, encountering a string of crime scenes all involving young women being drained of blood. Unfortunately, like Kolchak, Butterworth is considered a pest by the local police, who are tight-lipped about any details involving the crime:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

At first, Butterworth thinks this might all be the work of Michael Morbius, whom he'd met before. But, hearing an advertisement for an article by Harold H. Harold, a local writer who's ostensibly had dealings with none other than Dracula, Butterworth interviews him and begins to wonder if there might be some truth to his story. Suspicions which become reality when he picks up a police-band call and arrives to see a violent fight between the police and the vampire lord himself:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Fortunately, Butterworth was wearing a crucifix, and the sight of it forces Dracula to retreat. But the incident motivates him to follow up on a lead from Harold, pointing him in the direction of Quincy Harker and his group, who were recently involved in Dracula's battle with Doctor Sun. Yet Butterworth is going to find that, like his Hollywood predecessor, trouble tends to follow him:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Remember when I was thinking that the cure for Frank Drake's worthless bravado might be to have Dracula continue throwing him through walls? Since he still thinks he's somehow the Main Event for Dracula, we might as well start including windows:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As for Butterworth, he now has the unfortunate distinction of finding himself on Dracula's radar. Which brings us full circle, and a countdown to death:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

With death on the way, Butterworth has had the presence of mind to throw a few defensive measures together. But we know that, if he's anything like Kolchak, he's only going to survive this confrontation with a good supply of desperate nerve, along with hopefully a little dumb luck:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Things look pretty bleak for Butterworth. But never underestimate the value of good old-fashioned flight, combined with a little of that luck that would come in handy right about now:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Dracula naturally has no choice but to flee, spitting out words of vengeance as he takes to the air. As for Butterworth, later he meets with his editor, ~~Tony Vincenzo~~ Paul Lamenzo, prepared to offer his skeptical boss the mother of all stories. But the bane of Carl Kolchak usually was to see his evidence of the supernatural destroyed, confiscated, or otherwise fall apart, and Butterworth will prove to be no luckier in that respect:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

On the bright side, this is the Marvel universe, after all, so Butterworth will never have the same worries as his television counterpart about his story material eventually drying up.

Wow! Look at all the compelling questions this comic cover is asking:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

The Avengers sure look like they have a lot going on. Can this one story answer all of these questions? Well, the cover boldly says, "This One's Got All The Answers," so we can no doubt rest assured we're going to have all the answers. After all, when has a comics cover ever misrepresented the story inside?

Alright, put those hands down. I get the message.

We'd better take a peek at these questions, one by one, and cut right to the chase to see if this cover is on the level. First up:

(1) "WHO is the surprise super-villain Hawkeye battles alone?"

When the Falcon fills a spot in the Avengers lineup, Hawkeye discovers that the new government-mandated quota limit means that, with the inclusion of the Falcon, there's no longer room for the archer on the roster, and he departs somewhat bitterly. Not long afterward, he takes a position as Security Chief at Cross Technological Enterprises, where recent thefts have been taking place in their storage areas. Fresh on the job, it isn't long before Hawkeye sees action, when the "super-villain" shows her face--and her wings:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Hawkeye gives a great accounting of himself against a deadly, battle-bred foe. And after he's wrapped her up to be taken away, he even leaves her his calling card:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Question answered satisfactorily: AFFIRMATIVE

(2) "WHAT strange new problems plague the Scarlet Witch and the Vision?"

Good question. The Vision probably wishes he knew the answer himself. Wanda's keeping mum on the subject:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

That's it. That's all we really get in this issue.

Question answered satisfactorily: NEGATIVE

In fact, we don't find out what's going on with Wanda until eight issues (i.e., eight months) later:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

(3) "WHEN will the government stop harassing our heroes?"

Perhaps soon, since the Avengers have had it up to here with Henry Gyrich breathing down their necks:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But for now, we just don't know. And heralding the end of the team on the story's last page certainly doesn't shed any light on the situation.

Question answered satisfactorily: NEGATIVE

For what it's worth, the team's battle with the Grey Gargoyle in the following two issues helps them to regain a level of autonomy in their operations, so there's that.

(4) "WHERE does destiny take Captain America and the Falcon?"

Well, apparently destiny is taking them no further than the Avengers' communications center, to take care of a completely routine matter.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Question answered satisfactorily: YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING

(5) "WHY must Thor leave the Avengers?"

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Thor is taking off because things are heating up with his conflict with the Celestials. (Catch the "Eternal mission" play on words?) And Thor is keeping the Avengers out of it presumably because the situation seems to have Odin's fingerprints all over it, and he feels it's his duty to sort it out by himself:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Question answered satisfactorily: AFFIRMATIVE

So, overall, in exchange for our 40¢, this issue managed to answer two of these five questions, while leaving us hanging with the other three (or, in the case of the Cap/Falcon question, annoyed). Which means that if we do the math, we should probably have only been charged 16¢ for this story. But since the Hawkeye-Deathbird fight took up a good deal of space and was pretty well done, what do you say we cut them some slack, eh?

Can YOU

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Name This Marvel Villain??

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

I don't suppose you'd choose a name like Suprema for yourself if you have low self-esteem. On the contrary, this villain was confident enough to aim high with her ambitions (and, obviously, with her karate chops). Suprema began her career in crime by taking over New York's crime operations, one by one, using what she told her underlings was witchcraft. But she was actually using hypnosis, amplified by technology. After taking over gambling rackets and bringing crime bosses under her control, eventually she grew bold enough to attempt a takeover of S.H.I.E.L.D., by first taking control of Nick Fury and a few of his men:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Unfortunately, that brought Suprema into conflict with Captain America, whose shield deflected the hypnotism technology long enough to escape and do a little research on her. Turns out she and her brother (who wore a necklace to amplify Suprema's abilities) were ex-performers of a hypnotism act. Cap ended up using some signal jamming equipment in Suprema's armed truck to break the spell over Fury and his men, and from there it was just a matter of mopping up Suprema and her hirelings.

We didn't see Suprema again until about 250 issues of Captain America later, where she's been recycled into a character known as Mother Night (this time without the bell bottoms, thank goodness) and working (with her brother) alongside the "Sisters of Sin":

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Since she has a gang of bloodthirsty women at her beck and call--including the Red Skull's daughter, the homicidal Sin--her hypnotic abilities take her a little further this time, but Cap again breaks up her operations and hands her and her brother over to the police. Despite some further involvement with the Red Skull and his mercenaries, I think we can safely say that Suprema's career eventually went nowhere.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

I don't know what it is with these two. When it comes to Thor and Ulik, their encounters boil down to a vicious cycle of one knock-down drag-out after another, with emphasis on the "vicious." Ulik is by any definition one tough customer, and in his battles with Thor he more than holds his own--yet eventually, Thor overcomes his savagery and power, often decisively.

So why should we get so pumped about an issue of Thor on the racks that looks like it's going to be another fierce battle between the Thunder God and his troll nemesis, Ulik? How much more mileage can possibly be squeezed out of this matchup?

For me, I suppose I keep letting myself get hooked because in the back of my mind I keep holding out hope that this time, Ulik will triumph. Because, say what you will about his track record with Thor, but Ulik at times has come very close to winning, and that makes for good reading. Most of the time, the only thing that really wrecks such a victory is that Thor is usually pressed for time in some way, and he has other places to be where people are depending on him; and if that's not the case, then there's something that's otherwise spurring him to expedite the fight and deal with Ulik so that he can move on. To Ulik's credit, though, the troll doesn't make it easy for Thor. When this bruiser wants you to stand and fight, it's tough for a warrior with honor to ignore that kind of direct challenge.

Even so--even Thor reached a point when he tried to make Ulik understand just how it is:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And when he couldn't pound some sense into him, Thor tried jogging Ulik's memory with the cold, hard truth of a scorecard. Unfortunately, in troll-speak, that's called an "affront":

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Yet, the one thing you can't ignore about a Thor/Ulik fight is that most of the time, it's going to be a doozy. Ulik is either in it to win, or he's following a greater goal that requires him to engage the Thunder God with the gloves off. Either way, this brute is going to enjoy pummelling this enemy--and whichever way the fight goes, you can be sure once it's over that Thor will have some sore ribs, and a healthy understanding of the word "ruthless."

When these two first meet, it happens when war is breaking out between Asgard and the troll kingdom ruled by Geirrodur. And as with most introductions of new, formidable characters, Ulik's power seems a true challenge to Thor, as well as dangerous:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Unprepared for Ulik's savagery (even for a troll), Thor finds himself caught off-guard by Ulik's brutal and relentless assault. In fact, it's a rare day when you see the God of Thunder on the ropes--but this is what the God of Thunder on the ropes looks like:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Luckily for Thor, Ulik is pulled out of the fight and dispatched elsewhere by Geirrodur--a tactical blunder if ever there was one. What leader interrupts a fight where his own man is about to finish off the enemy's strongest warrior? Yet eventually, the paths of these two cross again, and their fight resumes, with Ulik's strength and power proving to be as daunting to Thor as ever:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

In more ways than one, Ulik is proving to be the better fighter in this battle. But, while he's indeed wearing the Thunder God down, Thor seems to have fighting spirit to spare:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

With Ulik at least temporarily dealt with, in time Thor is able to discover the secret of Geirrodur's show of force against the Asgardians, and his hammer finally downs Ulik at a crucial moment.

The two meet again during a conflict with Karnilla, the Norn Queen, and seem to pick up right where they left off. Only this time, Ulik goads Thor into battling without his hammer, a strategy which the troll soon comes to regret:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

In their next meeting, Loki has sicced Ulik on Thor while on Earth. But upon arrival, Ulik falls into the clutches of, believe it or not, the Ringmaster and his Circus of Crime:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Sheesh, if it's that easy to subdue Ulik, maybe Thor should think about replacing his winged helmet with a top hat. Still, you can't beat Thor's method for snapping someone out of hypnosis:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

You probably begin to see Ulik's problem here. When he says things like "never again," you just know there's a roundhouse on the way with his name on it:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

With the exception of a cover or two in the late '70s, this would be artist Jack Kirby's last battle between these two antagonists--and Ulik seems just as feisty as ever. When we catch up with Ulik again, we'll see more of how Big John Buscema handles a Ulik/Thor throwdown. If you're looking for a troll like Ulik to mellow with time, though, just remember that it was probably a troll that came up with the term "grudge match."

It's the year 2032--and when a team of Avengers arrives back at their mansion after a mission, the passing of decades has naturally brought changes to its membership:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Thor, the Vision, and Jocasta are of course immune to the passing of time--as is Arthur Dearborn, a/k/a Sunturion. Tony Stark, the original Iron Man, died of heart failure--and when James Rhodes suffered a stroke, the mantle of Iron Man was passed to Michael Rhodes, his son. But there is one other mortal resident of Avengers Mansion, living out her last days among her friends. And, in this reality, she remains:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Yes, "this reality"--an alternate reality tale written by David Michelinie, where the Scarlet Witch is coming to the end of her life. And we find that time has healed one old wound in particular:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

At this point in time, in "our" reality, the Vision and Wanda are still married, though they've temporarily placed themselves on the Avengers' inactive list; so in hindsight, I suppose you could look at this story as a portent of things to come as far as the difficulties in and eventual dissolution of their marriage. But in this story, we look back on a rift between them that didn't yet exist, nor had we any reason to think it would. The revelation had practically no impact for us, since no details were given about it--it seemed more like a quirk of the writer than anything substantive. But given everything that's happened to both of these characters since, you have to crack a smile and wonder if Michelinie was onto something.

We quickly move on from there, where we come to have no doubt of the bond of absolute love that exists between these two. However, during these fleeting moments between Wanda and the Vision, we see that the heartfelt exchanges between them have a witness:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And so, when Wanda has another attack and she's lying at death's door, the Vision is stunned to find that Jocasta has relocated her to the lab. Or, rather, what now resembles Jocasta:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

"The Leaving" is one of the few stories pencilled for Marvel by artist Paty--otherwise known as Paty Cockrum, wife of the late Dave Cockrum and who worked mainly in production. My first exposure to Paty was not as a penciller or colorist, but as one of the letter writers who would later be hired at Marvel:

"YE GODS! Has a girl no privacy? Holy Everybody-Raid-Wanda's-Bedroom-scene! Do all the Avengers (Wanda excepted) sleep in their colorful long-johns? Or was there an all-knight poker game going on downstairs? OOO-AHH-Holy Pun!"

The scene Paty describes in her letter happened when Wanda awoke with a start after having a nightmare about the Black Knight falling to his death:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Paty, a self-admitted "dyed-in-the-wool witch," went on to take issue with other magic-related aspects of that story--though her high-spirited letters obviously endeared her to the Marvel staff, and a colorist/production career was born (with the occasional penciller credit in addition). Here, she comes full circle with Wanda and the Vision, a couple she'd been rooting for ever since they'd shown signs of interest in each other while captives of Van Lunt.

Or: "Time Waits For No Man, But It'll Slow To A Crawl for a Thunder God"

We've already looked at three battles involving Thor, God of Thunder, and Ulik, the most powerful troll in King Geirrodur's troll army, and each battle has seen Ulik meet the same end--laid out for the count. Add to that the fact that Ulik was also conscripted with ease into the Ringmaster's Circus of Crime, and Ulik's street cred as a deadly, formidable foe to Thor seems to be in serious doubt.

But as you might have guessed, Ulik isn't the type to just lie down and grumble about how he was this close to victory against the Thunder God. This time around, Ulik and Geirrodur have concluded that in order to be successful in any war against Earth and Asgard, they need to first launch a daring plan to take Thor out of the picture by depriving him of his greatest weapon:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

This two-issue story by writer Gerry Conway and artist John Buscema has a few more things in play to keep us interested aside from just another Thor/Ulik battle. First, while we do have another troll war brewing against Asgard, the trolls using Earth as a stepping stone is going to be explored to greater extent. There's also a power play brewing, with Ulik using his stature among the trolls to effectively take control of Geirrodur's army and usurp his authority. Additionally, while Geirrodur is no less obsessed with launching attacks against Asgard, Conway's take on him presents him as somewhat more pragmatic, with Ulik the one instead throwing caution to the wind.

On the other hand, as this pair of uneasy allies formulates their strategy while spying on Thor, Geirrodur demonstrates he's still capable of making rash judgments:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

For instance, even after Ulik points out that Thor is no less invincible on Earth, Geirrodur--apparently with a hearing problem--concludes that Earth is where they should attack him. Eventually, though, their little brainstorming session ends with a decision to instead bring Thor to them--and while the Thunder God sleeps, a contingent of trolls is sent to silently transport him to their fiery pits.

And, upon waking, he's not happy about it.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But guess who else isn't happy?

It isn't long before the main event sneaks up behind Thor and perhaps seeks to end the battle before it can begin:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As you might have noticed, though Conway now has this fight cooking on all cylinders, he seems to have overlooked a few trivial things--for instance, the misspelling of Geirrodur's name, along with the fact that these two have met in prior battle three times rather than twice. He also seemingly ignores that, in their fight in Karnilla's kingdom, Ulik has already played the card of insisting that Thor sheathe his hammer and battle him hand-to-hand; but in this instance, Ulik's ploy is part of a greater plan to confiscate the hammer while Thor is otherwise focused on the battle.

And speaking of that battle--here, as before, Thor has no intention of giving this troll the satisfaction of victory in even a fist fight:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Finally, though, the plan is launched, as a slab of uru metal carried by a group of trolls locks onto Thor's hammer, with Ulik playing his part well to distract Thor at the crucial moment:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

All pretense of honor discarded, Ulik is now in this fight to win, using every dirty tactic at his disposal. And, with precious seconds already elapsed, Thor finally catches on to what the fight has really been about:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Thor then breaks into a run to recover his hammer. Conway now has less than a minute to play with--and by the time Thor reaches the trolls, who are already hoisting the uru slab over a furnace pit, only ten seconds remain before Thor changes back to Donald Blake. And we can probably say that it takes about five more seconds for this scene to play out:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

So we can assume that the hammer has already reached the bottom of the furnace--and when Thor makes his leap, that gives him about 5 seconds to find and make contact with it. Five seconds to hurtle down to the bottom, make his way to his hammer, and pull it free. Assuming he isn't incinerated before then. It's an impossible situation on two fronts: Thor simply doesn't have the time to make the steep drop to the bottom--and even if he somehow survives plunging into a furnace of fire, Blake surely won't. This can't be done.

BUT IT IS. (You won't believe your eyes, but go ahead and take a look. We'll still be here when you get back.)

In the meantime, Ulik and the other trolls assume the worst for Thor, and feel feisty enough to take their victory lap:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

When Thor returns to face the trolls, he finds that Geirrodur's armies have already begun their ascent to the surface, now aligning themselves with Ulik and not their king:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Thor takes off in pursuit, but the troll forces are already about to begin their war on unsuspecting mankind:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Whoa, ease off there, sport. Unless you've got a lot more trolls following you up that tunnel, I seriously doubt you're going to be able to take the entire planet. Maybe a few city blocks in New York. Baby steps, pal.

Still, you do have a powerhouse like Ulik on your side, and that'll go a long way toward scattering the opposition:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But let's save Ulik and his trolls the embarrassment of being wasted by an air strike--or, for that matter, the Ringmaster. There's someone else who has some unfinished business with these enemies of Asgard and Earth:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Almost immediately, though, Thor must move to stop a damaged building full of people from toppling, which unfortunately leaves him vulnerable to being attacked by Ulik. But Thor's friends have also arrived at the site to pitch in, such as the Warriors Three (er, two, apparently):

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As well as Tana Nile, who brings a Rigellian weapon which will eventually take its toll on Ulik. Assuming she has that kind of time:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But, once again, we'll see Thor deliver the blows which decide the battle, bringing to an end this fourth conflict between he and Ulik:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Which subsequently takes the fight out of the entire troll army.
You remember, the one that was going to conquer the entire planet:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Ulik's men cart his carcass back to Geirrodur, who, with Ulik being unofficially deposed, once again rules the troll kingdom with an iron hand and who wastes no time in disposing of this power-hungry troll:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But if you think a little thing like exile is going to put the brakes on Ulik or stop him from mixing it up with Thor again, you must have been standing too close to those stasis blasts. If and when Ulik makes it out of those pits, he's going to be looking to take down Geirrodur--and he knows just the Thunder God to help him do it.

Oh, no! The country is in the grip of a polar vortex! What's a Marvel reader to do??

Pour on the ice, that's what! Let's start with:

The original (chronologically, that is) Jack Frost!

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Iceman!

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

The evilJack Frost!

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Darn those miniaturized furnaces!

Endotherm!

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Jack Frost 2.0--Blizzard!

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Baby, it's ~~cold~~ sub-zero outside! Make sure you slap on your solar armor, okay?

Ah, the best laid plans of gods and nurses. It's a well-know fact that things can sometimes happen to throw a wrench into a "date night" with your lady love. But spotting a troll army in Central Park during a city-wide blackout has to be at the top of the list:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

So you can't really blame Thor for flying off to investigate. And, given the retrospective we've been doing on a certain arch-foe of Thor's, it's not hard to guess which troll is behind this invasion, or who gave the order to have Thor shot down out of the sky:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Of course, our old sparring partner--Ulik, formerly of the troll kingdom of Geirrodur, but who looks like he's gone rogue with his own army of followers. Ulik has come to draft Thor into a mission of vengeance against Geirrodur, though obviously he's inclined to vent a little of his anger against the Thunder God first. Thor doesn't yet know that this battle is all part of a plan by Ulik, as it was in their last meeting when Ulik and Geirrodur were going after Thor's hammer. But before it's over, Thor will know more of that--and of Ulik's escape from his punishment by Geirrodur--and of Zotarr, the Troll Supreme.

That's right--Zotarr.

Yeah, that got your attention, didn't it.

Naturally, with their history of all-out battle between them, Thor and Ulik fall right back into their routine, with hostilities of course being due more to Ulik's instigation than Thor's:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But, what's Ulik's game here? Why launch another incursion into New York? And why make a point of seeking out Thor? The answer becomes apparent, when the key to Ulik's subjugation of Thor--Jane Foster--is retrieved and brought to the scene:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

And so, with Thor in tow, Ulik and his men begin their descent to the troll kingdom, and Ulik recounts how he not only escaped Geirrodur's punishment but also located a lost tribe of trolls and became their leader so that he could plan a strike against Geirrodur. As for Thor, Ulik plans to put him to good use against Geirrodur's new muscle:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Soon enough, Ulik gets his wish--but it's Geirrodur who has instead hunted Ulik down, and prepares to unleash his powerful troll, Zotarr, against his brutish former subject:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Getting right to it, Geirrodur sics Zotarr on both Ulik and Thor, with the brute definitely in a "take no prisoners" frame of mind. Whatever we might have thought of Geirrodur's second-guessing himself in his last encounter with Thor and thus allowing Ulik to gain a foothold on Geirrodur's command of his armies, the troll king is all business here, and Zotarr cuts loose without mercy. As a result, Ulik finds his intention to slip away and deal personally with Geirrodur isn't going according to plan:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

With Ulik out of the picture at least for the time being, Thor re-enters the fray in earnest. And Odin help the "Troll Supreme":

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

When Zotarr is down and definitely out, Ulik and Thor discover that he was actually only a construct created by Geirrodur's furnace--which I suppose makes sense, since a powerful troll like Ulik doesn't come along every day, and he wasn't easily replaceable. But, what of the troll king himself? Well, wait until word gets around that he was captured by a nurse:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Now that Geirrodur is out of the way, however it happened, Ulik doesn't waste any time stepping forward and making a grab for power. Marvel sure picked a heck of a time to make a point of spelling the poor guy's name correctly:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But Ulik is in for a rude awakening if he's under the impression that Thor is going to be on board with the trolls moving on to conquer the Earth:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

As you've probably guessed, it's only a matter of moments before these two start trading blows again. But you also probably know how it's likely to end--and while I wish we could end this series on Ulik on a high note, Thor isn't feeling quite as charitable:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Yet, we haven't seen the last of Ulik; in fact, at their next meeting, he and Thor even join forces (this time voluntarily, on Thor's part) to deal with a monster threatening the trolls. But for all intents and purposes, we've likely seen his glory days as a brutal foe of Thor play out here. For what it's worth, he should definitely have a spot waiting for him in Thor's rogues gallery.

Given how much enjoyment comics companies have given their readers, and all the creative people busting their butts to put the issues on the racks that you and I devour, it's never pleasant to point out a character or concept that perhaps never should have seen the light of day. It's probably a topic ripe for discussion in one of Doug and Karen's reader forums--but I can easily get the ball rolling with a character spawned by the otherwise talented mind of Marv Wolfman, who one day went right off the deep end and gave us:

Wait for it...

SPIDER-ALICIA.

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Wolfman would probably tell us that we really need to lay the blame for this monstrosity at the door of Hydra--the international terrorist organization that, like A.I.M., often tinkered in their labs to come up with something horrible, just to see how bad bad could get. In this case, they've produced a serum from an analysis of the chemical structure which created Spider-Woman--and, as payback for the Thing destroying one of their bases, they've decided to test it on Alicia Masters. Worked pretty well, didn't it?

Naturally, once Alicia was transformed, they turned her loose on Ben, who has his own idea of payback in mind at the moment:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Ben and Spider-Woman do their best to halt Alicia's rampage, made worse when the Thing rips away Hydra's control device--leaving Alicia insane and striking out literally blindly. Ben doesn't want to have to resort to belting his girlfriend, so he places a quick call to Sue Richards--who stops Alicia by suffocating her, which is much more gentle.

From there, it's just a matter of finding a doctor to zap Alicia back to normal:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

No, I don't know what this guy is doing with Deathlok, either. Let's hope the crazy old fool doesn't go for broke and transfer Alicia's essence to him. Who's going to want to read about a cyborg sculptor?

Can YOU

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Name This Marvel Villain??

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

You don't really need a crash course on Dr. Strange's involved conflict with the Undying Ones to get a handle on the Night-Crawler, who had the name long before Kurt Wagner unhyphenated it and took it as his own. The Night-Crawler isn't really a villain by choice--he simply inhabits a dimensional cosmos that the Undying Ones want to use as a stepping stone to reach Earth and wipe us out. The catch is that they can only make the attempt when the stars are aligned correctly, which only happens once in--well, I forget, but it's a damn long time. Long enough to make sure they pull out all the stops when those stars line up.

So each time, the Nameless One (head honcho of the Undying Ones) sends a powerful foe to destroy the Night-Crawler so that the Undying Ones can cross over to Earth. Given the fact that they're still trying here, you can assume that until now they've never been successful. (I don't know how many notches the Night-Crawler has carved on one of those floating rocks in his dimension, but it's probably a lot.) So as you can see here, this time the Undying Ones arrange for their followers on Earth to seize Bruce Banner and transport him to the Night-Crawler's dimension in order to have the Hulk engage him in battle.

And judging by this awful teaser caption, it looks like even Marvel is betting on the Night-Crawler:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

It's not like the Night-Crawler is villainous in the traditional sense. But he's a deadly foe who's simply going to put you down and not do any hand-wringing about it. Even when the Undying Ones' servants on Earth transport one of their own to the battle scene so that Banner will change to the Hulk in order to protect her, the Night-Crawler makes it clear that he's not interested in any extenuating circumstances or being merciful:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

But as the battle reaches its peak, the Night-Crawler employs a sonic device against the Hulk, which turns out to be a fatal miscalculation. With a clap of his hands, the Hulk deflects back the sonic impulses, which then ripple through the Night-Crawler's cosmos in waves of destruction. Seeing his home is doomed, the Night-Crawler transports all of them to the dimension of the Undying Ones--where, in a rage, he decides to take their cosmos as his own. It's a distraction that Dr. Strange, a current captive of the Nameless One, makes good use of to transport himself and the Hulk back to Earth, assured in the knowledge that the Nameless One's chance to invade Earth has once again passed:

Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.

Unknown to the reader at the time, this issue lays the groundwork for all sorts of interesting future developments involving the Nameless One, Dr. Strange, the Hulk, the Sub-Mariner--and Barbara Norris, the girl who the Hulk fought to protect from the Night-Crawler but who sacrificed herself so that Dr. Strange and the Hulk could escape (a fate which is followed up on in a Defenders story). Exploring (and untangling) all of that will make for an interesting future post--but if it's all the same to you, I'd rather not steal the Night-Crawler's limelight by doing it here. Any guy who takes on a cosmos of evil sorcerers isn't someone I want looking in my direction.

The Fury of Firelord! The Yawn of Thor!

Home For The Holidays

'Twas The Night Before Christmas

Happy Christmas To All

Sword Under The Stones

Speak, Lockjaw! Speak, Boy!

The World's Fastest Man--Or Not

Thing's Best Friend

Cuando Contraataca El Matador!

The Hero Who Wouldn't Die!

The Night-Staker!

Who? What? When? Where? Why??

"That sly come hither stare... that strips my conscience bare..."

The Deadly Return of--You Guessed It--Ulik!

And To The Lab Table I Return

The Hammer and the Hellfire!

Flame ON, Already

Beware the Troll Supreme!

My Sweetheart--My Killer!

I'm Not Your Steppin' Stone